Find The Why That Makes You Cry

In everything we do, there’s an underlying motive.

Most of the times we’re not aware of it. Which often leads to having no direction in life, and thus getting nowhere.

If you want to change that, to go back to your path and follow it, you’ll need to find your why.

That can happen by simply questioning your actions at any moment, trying to figure out what makes you do what you do, and getting a clear idea of the things you want, the stuff that makes you happy, moves you and lets you become a better version of yourself.

That’s your purpose, mission, definite desire, destiny, and so on.

There are many names, and many others we haven’t heard of. But trying to name it can only take time.

So it’s better to invest that time in searching for it, analyzing your desires, getting to know yourself.

One way is to track your thoughts and feelings throughout the day. To notice when you’re not sure about something, disapprove, want to change something, feel like it’s not the right things, etc.

Stuff like that matters a lot as it shows what you really care about, what you know you should be doing and your version of right and wrong.

And the best thing is that once you find your why, you’ll sleep better at night, you’ll feel contentment and ease because you won’t be going against your nature anymore.
You’ll become good at what you do simply because it’s what you’re meant to do.

So don’t lose hope only because you haven’t found it yet.

Imagine a world where people know what inspires them and dedicate time to it each day. They walk around happy and satisfied, live an effortless life, don’t have any regrets or ‘what ifs’, because they are doing what they want to.

You need to find your why in order to:

You owe it to yourself, and to the world, to find your mission statement and to let it take you towards bigger goals and dreams.

Never underestimate the power of a focused mind. You’ll have it when you know why you do the things you do.

The reason must be so strong that it should make you cry. That’s how much you care about your deepest desire.

It’s what will make you leave a great legacy, live a life of fulfillment, make every day of yours passionate and express gratitude on a daily basis because of that.

So think about it, ask yourself and be honest, notice how you react to certain things, and whether or not you like what you currently do.

That’s how you’ll know if you’re on the right path.

Have you found your purpose yet? Do you know why you do the things you do? And how does it feel to be doing the right thing?

See also:

The key to dying happy
Know your ‘why’
Discover it
4 questions to find your purpose
The 5% trick for finding purpose in life
Motivate yourself to success

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5 Awesome Blogs I’m Currently Reading and What They Taught Me

There is so much great content out there.

According to this around 2 million blog posts are published every day.

And for the passionate readers that’s quite a challenge, as we sometimes feel a bit eager to cover everything that concerns our niche.

But we can’t.

Instead, we can focus more on people rather than content.

Some time ago I chose to start reading only blogs created by interesting people, who’ve already achieved something, who have experience and a unique point of view which can be felt in every post.

If the person is really cool, passionate about life and truly cares about what he writes, then his content will be great too.

And knowing that time is our most precious and limited resource, that we have this desire to learn more and improve, and have all the free resources on the Web, I think the best think we can do is look for awesome people.
And then follow their journey by reading what they have to say.

I learn a lot from reading blogs.

And what I enjoy the most is finding someone new out there (I usually hear about him from another blog in the area), whose message is so inspiring, and mission and goals so powerful, that I go to his archives and read everything that grabs my attention starting from day one.

Most of the time that means having to go through around 300 articles. Many I don’t read at all, others – I just skim.
But if you measure the time I spend reading his stuff, it’s obvious that I respect him, learn a lot and am simply amazed by the way he thinks and lives life.

So here I’ll share with you 5 such people. Who are constantly improving themselves, working hard, staying focused, and living extraordinarily.

They are different. But each one is worth mentioning, believe me!

The following post is quite long – almost 3000 words. But there’s a reason for that. I wouldn’t be wasting your time if I didn’t think the information you’ll find here was useful.

But if you’re in a hurry and still want to see what I want to share with you, just check out the 5 blogs.

  1. Mark Manson from MarkManson.net

He’s all about mind games, finding happiness through struggle, being aware of our limited time on earth and thus appreciating life more.
He gives unconventional advice and speaks from experience combined with a deep understanding of psychology.

He’s got a lot to say about relationships, habits, willpower, negative emotions.
And he shares the life lessons he learnt from everything he’s been through.

Here are some quotes from articles that can show you how his way of thinking is different from that of every other blogger out there:

“Before you are able to be good at something and do something important, you must first suck at something and have no clue what you’re doing. That’s pretty obvious. And in order to suck at something and have no clue what you’re doing, you must embarrass yourself in some shape or form, often repeatedly. And most people try to avoid embarrassing themselves, namely because it sucks.

Great things are, by their very nature, unique and unconventional. Therefore, to achieve them, we must go against the herd mentality. And to do that is scary.

Embrace embarrassment. Feeling foolish is part of the path to achieving something important, something meaningful. The more a major life decision scares you, chances are the more you need to be doing it.”

“ Remember that quitting is mostly a mind game. It’s only as big of a deal or as difficult as you make it. The physical effects and withdrawal symptoms aren’t any worse than those of a common cold. The struggle is mental. And if you decide that the struggle is monumental, then it will feel monumental. Conversely, if you decide it’s just a temporary roadblock in your life that you must take a few weeks to overcome, then it will be.”

“It’s not about doing or not doing. It’s all about how much of your sense of Self, your identity is attached to the outcome of what you do or don’t do. This is why the “don’t get attached to the past or the future” is common, because most people have their egos and ideas of themselves invested very heavily in either something they’re going to do one day or have done in their past. And it inevitably tortures them in the present.”

And here are some posts to check out for yourself:

Why some dreams should not be pursued
The most important question of your life
Love is not enough
How I quit smoking for good
The most transformational moment of my life
How to quit your day job and travel the world

  1. Dan Andrews from TropicalMBA.com

Dan and Ian are entrepreneurs, life style designers, who made a big step years ago leaving the ordinary life, and have been living and working in Thailand, Bali, The Philippines and other similar destinations since then.

They love their life, and most importantly – their work.

They own many Internet businesses, specialize in niche sites, their podcast on the TropicalMBA got really popular (and is actually the first podcast I started listening to. Before that I never gave that type of content a chance).

They are always open to new ideas, destinations, like-minded people and ways to improve.
I’ll focus more on Dan now, as he’s the writer behind the blog and I feel like I’ve learnt more about him through his posts.

He’s all about the hustle.
His posts, even if it’s about the entrepreneurial lifestyle, traveling the world and working from a tropical island – which I have nothing to do with, are still one of the most passionate I’ve read.

That guy really loves his work. He actually opened my eyes for what the ideal lifestyle looks life.

Yes, it’s all about freedom, being passionate about what you do and able to work from anywhere in the world while earning a lot of cash.
But many assume that this means working just a few hours every now and then.

You can’t really make more money and live a better life than the average person, if you don’t work more than him, right?

The truth is that you should fall in love with your work. You should wake up every morning and get excited about the stuff you’ll get done later. You need to find pure joy in working more than you’re supposed to, and to always expand your horizons and look for new opportunities.

Here’s what he says in one post:

“Some of you know I read the Four Hour Work Week and basically started my business the very next day. I still believe the book is pure genius. Before I read the book, I had the skills to start my own business, but I didn’t give myself permission to do so.

I encourage people to do an exercise that Ferriss advocates in the book: sit down and write out in precise detail exactly what you want in life. Do not write down what is realistic. Don’t qualify things. Just allow yourself 15 minutes to be a pure dreamer. There is plenty of time for reality later.

Once I was clear about what I wanted, I immediately strarted working almost non-stop to achieve my goals.”

That’s how you get better in every other area of life too. That’s how you learn to 80/20 your life, make better choices, earn more money, help others and inspire at the same time.

Other things I’ve learnt from reading and listening to Dan are:

  • do more of what works;
  • ship something every day – in my case, it means write every single day, post new articles, publish new stuff;
  • you’ll have to get used to saying no – if you don’t protect your time and money, other people will take control of them;
  • cultivate short term motivation and long term thinking;
  • the most important part of growing a business and making money is believing you can do it;
  • “If you can’t do something 5 hours a day, every day, you don’t like it enough to be highly successful at it.”;
  • “if lifestyle designers are those who live like millionaires without having a million bucks, then lifestyle business designers are those who spend their time like wealthy people before they are wealthy”;
  • if you’re not succeeding, you’re not specific enough. That applies to almost anything. Most people’s goals – as well as businesses, writing, etc – are way too broad.

It was Dan who taught me how to take niche content more seriously and learn more about it.
Also, I made my goals absolutely specific after reading a few posts of his on the subject. And can say I’ve never felt more encouraged about that before – outlining your goals and actually seeing them before they’ve been achieved is a magic process.

Here are some articles worth reading:

Four Hour Work Week? Try 100.
The script
What I’m all about
How to be a hustler
7 ways to start living the life you really want

And some podcasts:

The tao of the hustle
8 lesser recognized forms of the resistance
9 tough truths about running a business and changing your life

  1. Tynan from Tynan.com

It took me a while to figure out how to describe that guy. That’s how interesting and extraordinary he is.

I’ll just summarize some of the things he’s done and achieved through the years.

He’s one of the most famous pickup artists in the world. But in the blog he doesn’t focus on that, and I don’t think he actually has anything to do with it now.

However, it helped him hack self-esteem, break free from his comfort zone and be able to approach anyone.

In 2008 he sold all he had and went to travel the world. He and a friend “each packed a 28L backpack and made no advance plans, arriving in Panama on the first day with nowhere to stay and knowing no one. Throughout the year we got lost in the jungles of Panama, experienced the Cherry Blossom Festival in Japan, rode cross country on the roof of the slowest train in the world in Cambodia, rode 4x4s in the sand dunes of Qatar, ran with the bulls in Pamplona, and explored the miles of catacombs beneath Paris.”

He lives in an RV, owns an island, speaks Chinese and Japanese, has been a professional gambler for 7 years, has written great books and was one of the top bloggers in 2013 according to Time Magazine.

His posts are helpful mainly because of his experience, unique way of thinking, unconventional lifestyle, and the love for learning new things.
He takes deliberate decisions, tracks his progress, connects with exciting people all the time, builds successful habits and creates awesome work.

Here are some great posts:

Love work
(He believes that one of the best things we can do with our lives is to follow our passion and do the work we love. Then work hard every single day without letting anything distract us.
This post is absolutely amazing.)

Training yourself
(He writes about exceeding in your personal development, building strong routines and daily habits.)

How to be happy. Always.
A slice of humble pie
How am I doing on my goals?
10 things you can do right now to improve your life

  1. Sebastian Marshall from SebastianMarshall.com

Another extraordinary guy.

He’s all about history and strategies and in his site “the patterns of the ascent of artists, scientists, statesmen, entrepreneurs, and generals in history are disseminated to you and mixed with practical guidance on key issues so you can earn more, connect more with the people you want to connect with, grow your company, and further the causes you believe in.”

He’s an entrepreneur, writer, traveler, adventurer, technologist and really into philosophy, personal excellence, self-discipline, science, warfare and art.
Just imagine how all that is mixed in a beautiful way in his posts.

Some of the most interesting stuff on his site is about his habit of tracking – he tracks every single step of his day and thus learned how to eliminate non-productive activities, fill up dead time and get many things done.

Other things I like about him:

– he doesn’t believe in luck, but in deliberate decisions and taking action;
– he always keeps death in mind and that helps him live consciously;
– he’s grateful about the hardest moments of his life;
– he has a system for everything;
– he chases meaning, hot happiness;
– he considers producing much more important than consuming;
and much more.

The blog is unique, he leads a remarkable life and his point of view is worth checking out.

Here are some posts:

Me? I’m a strategist
The evolution of my time/habit/life tracking
Luck doesn’t exist
Constantly improve your environment
We all get 24 hours
On refining diet
Could you do genius quality work?
If you have too many goals you’re not doing, read this
I think greatness is something you do, not something you are

  1. Ludvig Sunström from StartGainingMomentum.com

He’s read hundreds of books, lives by his own principles, is all about self-education and practical self-improvement.

His posts are long and full of useful information, all a result of what he’s experienced, read and figured out.

I found the site recently, and after getting familiar with some of the post, I’ve decided to read at least 70% of the content there.

Here’s what makes him different from other bloggers:

he broke out of homeostasis, fasts 16 hours a day and got ripped;
– distills the information from all the books he reads and creates actionable strategies;
– thinks long-term;
became a momentum machine;
– has found his strengths and keeps working on them;
– studies history and successful people and analyzes their steps and mindset;
reads books optimally;
– keeps a book for summarizing the books he reads;
has become consistent in everything he does.

Here are some posts you must read:

How to understand and use the power of incremental change
9 things you need to know to unlock your natural talents & succeed in life
How I got ripped in 2 years by following these 13 principles
Combine powerful psychological principles to boost motivation, build self-esteem, and be a winner every day
23 excellent books you should read
The 11 maxims you should live by
How to find people worthy of your time and get them to like you

***

So these are the 5 awesome blogs I wanted to share with you.

There are many more like them out there, of course. These are just the ones I’m currently reading and most passionate about right now.

Other that pop up in my mind right away are Tim Ferriss , Chris Guillebeau, Steve Pavlina, Sean Ogle from Location180, Maneeth Sethi from Hack The System, Scott H Young, Leo from Zen Habits.

I’ll never stop being interested in them as they live great lives, always challenge themselves, want more out of life, are extremely productive, have strong values and powerful habits, and most importantly – have become role models and are trying to help others by sharing what they’ve been through.

I can even say they are my mentors. And even though our relationship is online, and it’s all through their articles, I learn a lot, change myself and take important decisions.

So if you made it to the end of the post, I assume you too are interested in people like these and what they have to share with the world.

And that’s great!

So keep doing what you do, keep working on yourself and learning from awesome blogs.
It will soon pay off.

And if you know about another blog similar to these 5, please share it in the comments below. I’m dying to check it out.

Also, don’t hesitate to express your opinion on what I’ve just written in this post. I want to know what you think of these people and what they’re doing with their life.

What Would You Do If You Weren’t Afraid

“Each of us must confront our own fears, must come face to face with them. How we handle our fears will determine where we go with the rest of our lives. To experience adventure or to be limited by the fear of it.”
Judy Blume

The questions we ask ourselves are often the most important ones.

As this way we can get to know ourselves better, reach a higher level of consciousness and find secrets, answers, conclusions and revelations that can later turn into life-changing decisions and steps to take.

And even if you don’t find a particular answer, it’s going to be one great journey.

So set aside a few minutes now to contemplate on one question. Ignore everything else around you. The world can wait for a while.

Focus on imagining in details a life without fear.
What would you do if you weren’t afraid?

The thing is that we’re often afraid of so many things that it’s hard to even imagine doing them.

But what if you weren’t afraid? What if you could go out there and conquer the world, do whatever you want, try every challenge you’ve ever thought of, speak up, be direct, take risks, etc.?

I bet you would be successful, happy, free; there wouldn’t be any limitations any more. Because fear is our biggest barrier to achieving things in life, to changing, trying new stuff and feeling alive.

Actually, it’s often so ingrained in us, that we don’t believe that there’s any chance for us to achieve something big, to live the good life, to have adrenaline in our days.

But here’s something you should know:

There are two types of fear. The rational one – that keeps you alive, and the irrational one – that prevents you from living.

And if you make it a habit to notice the second type each time it occurs (such as fear of failure, of people’s opinion, of public speaking, etc.), you’ll be able to say to yourself “Hey, wait a minute! That’s absolutely ridiculous. And I can’t say ‘no’ to such an idea/opportunity just because my mind tells me it’s scary.”

Here’s what Peter Scott from Design a Fearless Life says here: 

“I’ve gone skydiving, and I enjoyed the hell out of it, but I would NEVER jump out of a place without a parachute.  That’s a rational fear that serves to keep me alive.

Most fears are irrational.  But in reality, as human beings, we often convince ourselves that our irrational fears are rational.

As a practical action step…find something that you’re afraid of that is an irrational fear…something that’s not going to cause you physical harm, drain your bank account, or destroy your relationship.  And then do something to prove to yourself that it’s irrational.

Once you’ve found this irrational fear, make the commitment to get over that “fear” today by doing the thing you fear.

You need to do something that is a radical shock to your comfort zone.  It needs to make your knees shake, your palms sweat, and put your heart in your throat.

And when you go to bed tonight you will have done something different, and you will wake up tomorrow with a new past.  You repeat that for a couple of days, and you’ll realize that the shit that you’re afraid of is an illusion.  IT DOES NOT EXIST.

You need to realize that if you haven’t faced your fears, you haven’t truly lived. And that’s so much wasted potential.

You owe it to yourself, to society and the world in general, to get out there and do every single thing that you don’t want to do, feel uncomfortable with, makes you anxious, or else.

And as all successful people that are living a fearless life have discovered, the only way is to simply do it.

Having time to analyze it gives you the chance to play different scenarios in your head, often the worst possible ones, to worry and think of excuses. And if you do that for some time, you give up. And you keep living in your comfort zone.

So get out there today and face your fears!

Only when we are no longer afraid do we begin to live.
Dorothy Thompson

See also:

Fear is the root of your problems
From fear to freedom
Let go of fear by stopping the stories in your head
Active fear, passive fear
5 ways to destroy the illusion of fear

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What I’ve Learned from Blogging

Blogging is a great experience. And it can teach you a lot of things if you’re opened to its lessons. I’ve been doing it for less than two years now, but it has changed me and my life considerably. Here is what I’ve learned and how it has helped me:

  1. You inspire.

The comments and emails from readers are the proof for that. I feel great every time someone tells me that a post of mine made him take an important decision, become positive about something, smile, stay motivated, etc.

  1. Your writing matters.

The fact that people responded and took the time to write me long emails, for example, just to thank me for my blog and the way it made them feel, showed me that what I do matters to others, too.

  1. You become a better writer.

Writing is a habit, it takes time and willpower, needs to be practiced and is like a muscle. At the beginning it’s hard, but after some time it gets easier. And without noticing, you start writing posts with no effort at all.

  1. You learn how to be consistent.

Consistency is a key. Every blogger has been discouraged in the beginning. There were no comments, sometimes no views at all. But those who stayed consistent saw progress. And that motivated them to keep going. Now I have some loyal readers that read and comment on each article of mine, and many visitors that find me through browsers.

  1. You become more tech-savvy.

I knew nothing about computers before that. Technology is still not my thing, but I’ve learned how to do some stuff for the last two years. I know much more about blogging platforms, social media, blog design, search engines, SEO, html and the Web in general. And although it’s nothing compared to what people in the Internet industry are aware of, it’s a lot more than I was able to do before that. I also learned about publishing platforms, eBooks, working with MS Word and editing a work according to the requirements of digital publishing, book marketing, presenting yourself, promotion, emails, finding influencers, guest posting, etc.

I’m a Marketing student, it’s my last year now. And honestly, what I learnt at university is nothing compared to that through blogging, reading, writing and researching (as it’s connected to my passion, I’m motivated, and no one actually makes me do it).

  1. You become more confident.

I realized I was getting better at blogging. People liked it, there was some traffic regularly, sharing in social media, readers were coming back for more. And that was the proof I needed to boost my confidence as a writer.

I also showed myself that I can stay consistent in something if it really matters to me, that I can dedicate time every few days to get a little better, and that I was developing the great habit of writing.

Then I started writing books. After that Lifehack.org accepted me as a regular contributor and my posts were read by a huge audience. That boosted my spirit and made me reach out to other big sites in the niche and offer articles of mine to them. And I got published in sites like TimeManagementNinja, Addicted2Success, PickTheBrain, DumbLittleMan. And eventually Time Magazine.

  1. You have a vision.

I believe that one day I can make a big income from my books, my blog can get a lot of traffic, and I can inspire and encourage people while working on my habits and improving myself at the same time.

I had a vision since day one, but it was getting bigger and bigger with every little success on the road.

  1. You share your thoughts.

My posts are all a result of events in my life, thoughts in my head and dreams and realizations of mine. I let it all out through my writing, and it seems to be working pretty well.

  1. You become braver.

In the beginning, I was thinking too much before posting, choosing a category, answering a comment, the right picture, the perfect title, not making mistakes, etc. But now I just write confidently, I try new things, I’m not afraid to email a successful blogger, or post something that will receive criticism.

  1. Following your passion is life-changing.

Most of the people who start a blog and stay consistent with it, are also the ones who have their priorities straight, have goals and dreams, have found their passion and are now working on it. That shows us that it’s possible to follow your passion, do the thing you love, inspire people with it, and grow as a person throughout the process. Here’s what I’ve written on the topic: How to find your passion now and start doing what you love How to get paid to do what you love How to become a hard worker while loving what you do, Part 1 Part 2 The real face of passion and how it can change your life

  1. You learn how to let go of perfectionism.

A post can be edited forever, there’s no right or wrong version of it. And you’ll never find the perfect blog name, post title, theme, font or color, picture, or else. Thinking too much about stuff like that ruins your original idea. So just choose what feels right at that moment. You can change it later. For now, just press the button and move on. Eventually, you learn to use that approach in other areas of your life.

  1. You’re more passionate than ever.

Many times you’ll be looking forward to checking your dashboard, reading comments and seeing how many views your new post has. Or to writing your next one and waiting for people to respond. It gives you a purpose, no matter how small. And the fact that it can become something huge in a few months keeps you encouraged.

So what have you learned from blogging?

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How to Find the Meaning of Life and Reach a State of Peace

I’ve heard many answers to the existential question about the meaning of life.

And as with everything else, each individual has his own view according to his beliefs and experience, things he wants and is going through right now.

But there is one problem – he puts meaning in every little detail of his average day and sometimes that affects his version of his mission in life, and eventually his actions.

Life is about more than the daily worries, fears, people that come and go, and things we pay too much attention to.

And in this – finding meaning in life – we’re all equal, because the goal is one.

Peace of mind.

Life is about finding peace in the chaos, silence in the noise, meaning in every event and wisdom in hardships and grief.

Because peace is the highest happiness.

It’s hard to find with all the distractions around us, but once seen, we continue our life in such contentment that we know we are living the way we should be.

People try to create peace, but it’s already there. You can’t force it because that’s the opposite of it.

Peace consists of:

If you can do that, you know what life is all about

We often try to find solutions to every problem.
But sometimes what we consider a problem is just a series of coincidences, something that has turned out in a certain way and there’s nothing we can do about it.

The ‘problem’ then is in our mind.

We want to change things. We think we did something wrong and analyze the events too much, we also stress over it.
But the real solution to everything in life is peace itself.

So let go of all grudges, negative thoughts, fears and whatever else it is that prevents you from living now, and what will be left is peace.

You get rid of all the distractions so that you can see the essential.

You don’t struggle to change and make things better.
Instead, you let go of struggle and make peace with what is.

I’ve become a bit better in that.

It’s such a relief to be calm in a stressful situation, to be like in a quiet meditative state on the inside while there is a war out there.

It’s one of the reasons Buddhist monks are so calm, and contented. It’s why people keep visiting their monasteries and ask them for their secret. They go to their home, feel the peace there and want to take it.

But the moment they have it as a material desire, the moment they define their current situation as a problem and look for a solution, the moment they want to have more of something someone else has, this peace is ruined.

We don’t really know how to deal with it.

But it’s all so easy.

It’s just peace – it’s right here, right now, and is exactly what will be left if we eliminate our desires, grudges from the past and worries for the future, let go of attachments and comparison, and simply see and appreciate what we have. That is when peace will reveal itself to us.

Peace of mind is what we all want.

Everyone puts that off, they think peace and happiness will come after they start a family, finish their tasks, or else.
But the truth lies in finding beauty in imperfections, making peace and experiencing the present moment by being mindful.

We’re constantly complaining about everything, but instead we should try to be okay with what we consider problems, to accept them as they are.

So find peace now. Don’t wait for that, don’t think you don’t deserve it and don’t put effort in it.

Just see it, it’s inside of you and everywhere around you.
You just need to open your heart and embrace it.

“When you realize how perfect everything is you will tilt your head back and laugh at the sky”
Buddha

See also:

What you need to live a life of purpose
Create meaning by helping others
Inner peace
40 ways to create peace of mind
50 quotes that will free your mind

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Habits, purpose and a little bit of zen.

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