The way we speak is one of the things that separate successful people from average ones.
Success can be measured in many ways and some of them are very important. Even if you have a clear vision, think positively, are in control of your actions, successful at work, believe in yourself and have set the right goals, there is still one piece of the puzzle that is missing.
Physical and mental health, relationships, business, your talents and hobbies and how you look and feel are just some of the things you have to consider and take care of. And last but not least, there comes the way you speak.
Social life is an important aspect of your life and what people think of you inevitably influences your own perception of yourself. One of the biggest factors that affects people’s opinion of you is how you speak.
I know two things: people are going to judge you one way or another and you can’t please everyone. But you can do your best to make them respect you, admire your way of speaking and actually listen to what you say.
You may have many wise things to share with others but if you do it uncertainly, shyly and with the wrong words and diction, no one will take you seriously and that will directly affect your confidence, business, relationships with colleagues, clients, new friends and close people. You may even be ignored by your own kids if you don’t speak well and with confidence.
Here is what you need to do in order to express your confidence through your voice, say what you want, be heard and look, sound and be successful:
How to Speak Successfully?
1. Don’t reveal your emotions.
You may be scared, worried, frustrated, sad or in doubt but if your face doesn’t show it then everyone will continue to listen to you and you yourself will feel stronger.
Imagine how a person who is speaking in public suddenly starts sweating, feeling insecure and shy and can’t continue his speech. Then everyone will just go home and forget every word he said even if he was the most influential businessman.
This is what can happen if you express how you feel on the inside. Save that for later.
I’m not saying that you have to keep it all to yourself, but that letting yourself be emotional once can destroy what you’ve been building for so long.
2. Use the right gestures.
Body language is proven to be more powerful than the actual words we use and has more effect on our overall performance and what others will think of us. So even if you feel insecure, using energetic gestures and just pretending to be strong and confident will make you so.
3. Loud voice.
Speaking in a loud voice helps you feel sure in what you say and holds the attention of the person in front of you.
Having a big smile on your face is beneficial in everything you do. With it you look and feel more positive and pleasant.
A smile is the most important part of the successful look so don’t forget to wear it when you go out.
5. Don’t react to judgmental or offensive words.
There will always be someone to judge and criticize you for everything you do. He may or may not be right but this will only affect you if you let it. How you react to things defines how you perform.
Be strong, stay positive and don’t listen to the naysayers.
6. Don’t get out of control.
If you let yourself be angry, you can only lose. But ff you want to be successful and become a better person, you need to have control over your anger, hatred, jealousy and all the other strong negative emotions. These feelings bring only unfavorable results and harm people. Learn how to deal with that and don’t let it ruin all you’ve achieved.
7. Use positive words.
A successful person’s vocabulary is different from the one ordinary people use.
Words like “problem”, “can’t”, “negative” and “fail” just don’t exist.
Instead, he uses “opportunity”, “can”, “positive” and “lesson”.
This is one of the best characteristics of top achievers – they speak about great ideas, beautiful moments, nice people and big opportunities and use only positive words.
So start now and work on your vocabulary. Notice which words you use often in your everyday dialogues and eliminate the negative ones. Write a list of strong and powerful words and bring it with you wherever you go so that you can read them at anytime.
8. Clear speech.
Articulate every word, make pauses and don’t mumble. Imagine how you feel when someone speaks so unclearly that you can hardly understand a word and don’t become that person.
9. Speak directly.
When someone asks for your opinion, ideas or wants you to take a decision, don’t answer with “I don’t know.”, “I haven’t thought about it.”, “I’m not sure.”, etc.
Adopt the habit of speaking confidently and say what you think, answer questions immediately and make people understand that you are reliable, determined, decisive and completely aware of your actions and desires.
10. Stay true to your beliefs.
Once you decide something, stick to it. If it turns up to be the wrong decision, accept that and move on. But don’t let others manipulate you and talk you out of what you’ve wanted in the first place. Otherwise, you’ll appear weak, like someone who doesn’t have his own opinion and is easily manipulated.
11. Normal intonation.
Don’t shout at people but also don’t speak too quietly. Work on your intonation and try to sound confident and in balance.
As you see there are many things to consider before you stand up in front of people and start talking. Take your time, work on it and with the right attitude and amount of effort, you’ll soon be able to speak successfully. This will make you believe in yourself even more and will also improve your communication skills and social life as you’ll become outgoing and a good company.
What do you think about all that? And what other ways to improve the way we speak do you know about?
Full-time freelance writer. Lifestyle designer.
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