The Dirty Little Secret About Discipline And How to Get It That No One Wants You to Know 116

discipline and freedom

If I look back on my life and analyze it in terms of discipline, it’s been quite the battle.

I still frown when remembering how they had to drag me out of bed to take me to kindergarten in the early morning. And that continued for years.

Once I was there, the teachers wanted me to play at a certain time, eat at a certain time and sleep for a certain period of time – most often when I didn’t want to.

I remember that at some point they had to move my bed out of the children’s bedroom and take it to a separate place where at least I would leave others rest and hopefully be bored enough to fall asleep myself.

Then came school. In a nutshell, it’s doing what you don’t want to do when you really don’t feel like doing it. A lot of energy and focus got wasted there.

In between, it was the summer holidays and the weekends. Where parents want kids to be at home when things get interesting on the playground, and want them out when they get creative at home. Again, no balance. Just unpleasant memories.

It was the same in high school, but fortunately we’re mature enough to care less at that time. And last but not least, university. Where you’re actually learning something meaningful that might be put into practice, but again you’re told when, what and how. And you don’t like it.

Don’t get me wrong. I had a great childhood. But discipline wasn’t an option and I felt so miserable when someone was making me do something that I just didn’t want to. Even when I gathered all my powers and will and did it, my performance was awful, so was the end result. So no one was happy in the end.

And in order to make my point, I’ll let you know how things currently are in my life:

I can easily wake up around 6 a.m. and jump out of bed without the need for a second alarm. I have a light smile on my face, and can’t wait to get to the computer to start working.

Then, I do it for 4 hours straight – something I’ve found to work best for me. I’m ruthless with these 4 hours, nothing else gets in the way at that time. I’m focused on and thinking only about the work in front of me.

Then I can do stuff. Whatever I want. But I add more hours of work later in the day or after a short break for lunch. It’s not a problem to make it up to 10 per day.

In my free time, I’m all about learning stuff. I can read and research for hours, and work on side projects that may or may not make me successful or bring in money in the future. But it’s not about that.

Before I wasn’t a fan of homework, not to mention side projects. I also couldn’t concentrate easily, was impatient, and definitely not productive.
Now, however, I’m proud of the work I get done in these 4 sacred hours. And everything else I do after that.

As for food, in the very first part of my life I wasn’t really fond of it and they had to make me eat my meals. Then, at some point in high school I was often overeating and in love with some foods. That’s when society couldn’t let me enjoy a single bite – although that didn’t stop me – as I was eating a bit more than what’s expected.

Now, on the other hand, I’m not eating in the first part of the day. And can go without thinking about food till the evening. Then, I have the freedom to eat whatever I want. And because of the fact that I do, I don’t overeat, but can still enjoy any food I desire.

I used to be a night owl. Still creative, but thought my energy could only be found from noon on.

A wrong assumption, obviously, considering how super productive I am now in the early hours of the day. Which makes me think that people can’t really be divided into 2 groups – morning people and night owls – and that anyone can fall in love with the time before dawn if he finds the right reason.

I had a hard time with time management too, as most people do. But now my priority is my work time, and once I structure everything else around it, things seem to fall into place.

So what’s the dirty little secret about discipline that no one wants you to know?
That you can only be disciplined if you decide so. And when others make you do stuff, it will never end well.

The Killer Combination of Passion and Freedom

What changed things for me was doing what I love and having the freedom to do it whenever I want to. That gives me a reason to wake up early, to be focused, to prioritize, to make compromises, work hard for hours without feeling exhausted, be full of ideas, and happy in general.

If there’s a formula for contentment and great results, I’d say it’s passion + freedom.

These two are so powerful, especially when combined, that if you do find the former and do whatever it takes to get the latter (by turning what you love into your career), you’ll be a happy person and can only exceed in life from there on.

And I wish that could happen to you too. Unfortunately, because you can’t really feel the benefits before experiencing this killer combination, you’ll have to trust me and all the other people out there (compared to which my achievements in life are still nothing).

So I wish you, from the bottom of my heart, to take the countless opportunities of today’s world (especially of the Internet) and find something that gives you joy. Not just something you like, or enjoy. But an activity you love.

Then, see what others have done to start practicing it online, to make money from it, or to turn it into a whole business. And do it. Work day in and day out, as hard work is the biggest part of it. But it won’t really feel like work, as it’s something you would be doing for free anyways – that’s how much you should love your passion.

Then, you’ll be working for yourself. Like I am. And can decide when and for how long to do it, can take up more projects whenever you feel like, will be making yourself rich not anyone else, won’t have to go to an office, and so on.

And that’s just the beginning. Freelancing just helps you make a living and gives you the ultimate freedom – you can become location independent at some point and live a mobile lifestyle. But that’s another topic for discussion.

After that, you can create a business and become an entrepreneur. You can get others to do work for you, and even build a team of other passionate individuals you can trust. Then you’ll create valuable products that people will love and which will make their lives easier and better in some way. That will be your contribution to the world, you’ll have a chance to make big money, and connect with some influential people.

But if you don’t feel like it, there’s no need to get into all that.

No matter what you decide to do with your life, remember that all the moments of misery and mediocrity are a matter of choice. Because your ideal lifestyle is out there. It’s waiting for you to unleash your potential, find something you’re passionate about and reclaim your time and freedom.
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Signs You’re Stuck in a Rut (and How to Get Out) 17

signs you're stuck in a rut and what to do about it

Life has its ups and downs for all of us, but sometimes those downs creep up and take hold without us noticing. All of a sudden we look around and realize that we’ve found ourselves stuck deep in a rut. If you don’t know you’re in a rut, it can be very difficult to get out and this can lead to lasting negative effects on your health and happiness.

So how do you know when you’re in a rut?

And, more importantly, what can you do to get back on track?

One of the biggest red flags that demonstrate that you might be drifting listlessly through your own life is that you spend most of it daydreaming of being somewhere else.

It’s perfectly normal to spend some time in the office wishing you were lying on a beach instead, but if this is a permanent state of affairs, it’s a sign that you’re dangerously bored. Try adding some spontaneity into your life to liven things up a bit, at least until that next vacation.

If you don’t have an exotic location to jet off to, you need to make sure you still have some things to look forward to. If the only thing you have any anticipation for is getting into bed at the end of every day, then you’re definitely in a rut and need to start finding enjoyment in the little things in life, appreciating all of the things that come in between waking up and going back to bed again.

Social media is a great tool for lots of things in our lives. But it can also have a very damaging effect on your mental health because it’s easy to be fooled by the edited highlights of their lives people put on there. This can leave you feeling envious because the day to day reality of your life doesn’t look like what you assume everyone’s life is, so stop obsessing over other people and shift your focus back to yourself.

Doing this shouldn’t come at the expense of actually ever seeing other people or doing anything, of course. So if you’re finding that you are spending all of your time at home rather than getting out and seeing friends, or claiming that you don’t have time to do anything (when the reality is quite the opposite), these are all also signs that you need to think hard about changing your habits.

Nobody ever wants to get stuck in a rut, but in a world where work-life balances are getting ever more hard to maintain and technology is eating into face to face interactions, it’s easy to find yourself wondering where your life went. These tips from NetCredit will help you identify whether you are living yours in a rut and will help you start to find your way out again.

More tips on how to get unstuck:

How to Get Your Motivation Back
How to Boost Your Energy and Vitality for a Successful Life
How to Embrace Acceptance in Life
How to Deal with Indecisiveness