Let’s admit it. Finding the right person for us is one of our life missions.
Living in denial doesn’t help. You may already be in a relationship where things aren’t going so well, or you never found Mr. right and are desperately trying to make others like you (which is a wrong approach).
Whatever your situation is, remember than you should never settle down for less than you deserve. There are some changes you can make in your life and mindset, starting today, to make sure you find the right partner and keep him.
Here’s how the journey to finding the right person begins:
1. Get clear about what you want, and what you don’t want.
Set your priorities straight for a start. But begin with what you don’t like in a potential partner.
It may be things that disappointed you in others in past relationships, the stuff you can make no compromise on, the way a person behaves that makes you feel inferior to him, or a habit that annoys you too much.
It’s better to get clear about these from the very beginning, so that you know what you’re looking for.
Once you eliminate the things you don’t want and are completely aware of them, what’s left will be the traits of a person you’d actually love to spend your life with.
Try to figure out why you don’t have a partner at this point. Be brutally honest with yourself. Analyze your strengths and weaknesses, what went wrong with people before, what feedback they gave you, etc.
It’s smart to know what to be careful with in the future and where to make changes.
2. Become your best self.
Before getting out there again and finding the right person for you, you must improve yourself so that you’re worth pursuing and can have a lot to offer.
You have all it takes to be loved by anyone, but you need to be more confident and trust yourself, to look and feel better, to develop some good habits, learn some new things and go after your life goals.
All that will make you disciplined, determined, stronger and more experienced, and you’ll become an interesting person that has a lot of awesome stuff to talk about.
3. Learn what a man/woman really wants.
It’s time to educate yourself a little in terms of relationships, psychology and love in general.
It’s worth taking the time to get to know a man’s/woman’s mind and dig deeper into what one wants from a potential partner, what they look for on a first date, what is a turn-off and what can make a person fall in love with you in a short period of time.
There are interesting conclusions you’ll come to if you read a bit on the topic.
Explore the mind of the opposite sex. Because in the beginning, when you two are still getting to know each other, it’s a game, really. You can use the right techniques, present yourself in the best way possible, hack body language, use the right words and speak in a certain way, to make sure finding the right person leads to keeping him too.
Of course, the best knowledge comes from experience. So don’t be afraid to put yourself out there, approach new people and see what works best.
In time, you’ll feel comfortable in your skin, will beat shyness and social anxiety, will know how to start a conversation and what topics to avoid the first few times. That makes finding the right person easier, and attracting him and making him pursue you is a consequence of the 3 steps above.
But that’s just the beginning. Start doing these today and look forward to welcoming your soulmate in your life soon.
Here are the next steps to finding and keeping a man and how to finally take your dating life to the next level.
So what will you start with today to make sure you’re becoming a better version of yourself, keeping your priorities straight, upgrading your game, and attracting new and awesome people in your life?
Full-time freelance writer. Lifestyle designer.
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