LRS 035: The Outer Factors That Cause Low Self-Esteem

The Outer Factors That Cause Low Self-Esteem - The Let's Reach Success Podcast

In today’s episode of the Let’s Reach Success Podcast we’ll talk about confidence again, but this time it’s about having low self-esteem in particular, and only when that’s due to outer factors like family, the media, society, environment, etc.

I’ll explain how 8 such influences lower our confidence and what we can do about it to take back control.

What you’ll hear is pretty useful as sometimes we feel insecure and stuck in life, but it’s not really our fault, it’s what’s around us that affects our thoughts and actions.

In this case, it’s people, beliefs, the workplace, and more. Luckily, it’s us who decide what shapes our identity.

You can’t let outer factors lower your self-esteem anymore. It’s time to take action.

Show Notes:

  • What to do when your parents are killing your self-esteem [2:16]
  • Why the past shouldn’t be stopping you from anything [3:30]
  • The wrong perception society has created about confident people [4:23]
  • How what’s around you affects your confidence level [7:19]
  • Why your vocabulary matters more than you think [8:26]
  • Why you shouldn’t worry if no one supports you [10:44]


Action Steps on How to Fix Your Low Self-Esteem

  1. Don’t listen to your parents if they tell you you’re not good enough. That’s just how they express their feelings. Let the desire to hear them encourage you go, and focus on taking action to becoming a better version of yourself instead.
  2. Learn to take the lessons from the past but to never let the mistakes from it affect your confidence in the present.
  3. Free yourself from the perception of confident people society has built. Don’t answer anyone else’s expectations but do what feels right.
  4. Don’t compare your life to the life of others and concentrate on playing your own game.
  5. Remove anything that makes you have low self-esteem and make changes in your environment until it breeds success.
  6. Use powerful and positive words only.
  7. Be alright with rejection, most of the times it has nothing to do with you.
  8. Start walking and talking with attitude and over time you’ll be taken more seriously by superiors.
  9. Realize you’re your biggest supporter and you don’t need anyone else to motivate you.

Listen to the episode here:

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What causes low self-esteem in your life? How can you fix it?

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How to Look and Sound More Confident

How to Look and Sound More Confident

We associate confident people with success. But does confidence lead to success, or does success lead to confidence?

It’s a bit of a chicken and egg scenario. But there is plenty of evidence to suggest that working on your confidence levels will indeed boost your achievements in the workplace.

The thing about confidence is that it works two ways.

On the one hand, exude confidence and your clients and colleagues will have confidence in you – self-belief is very reassuring to others!

In fact, for better or worse, the mere appearance of confidence can be more likely to get you a promotion than your actual ability! When you think of some of the dubious phonies who’ve leapfrogged you in the past, it kinda makes sense, right?

And on the other hand, confidence builds confidence within yourself. When you adopt the look and the sound of the self-assured, you begin to feel bolder on the inside. You take risks and put yourself forward for opportunities you might otherwise not have. You begin to work with clear, bold strokes rather than inching ahead in half-measures.

Great – so how to create that feeling? Well, in the long-term, you can use cognitive behavioral therapy techniques to deal with the underlying causes of your indecisiveness and lack of confidence. But in the short run, getting the aforementioned look and sound of self-belief is a fairly simple matter of adjusting the way you speak, listen, and move.

If you’re particularly shy, try starting with your hands.

Keep them out of your pockets.

Burying your hands in your pockets instantly gives the (possibly correct) impression that you are nervous or uncertain.

And even the (hopefully incorrect) impression that you are dishonest or lazy. Keeping your palms open and faced upwards is a way of opening up to those around you and exuding trust.

Likewise, a firm handshake of around two-five seconds communicates warmth and self-assuredness. A limp handshake, on the other hand, might create the impression that you feel out of your depth. And an over-strong handshake always feels like the giver is trying to prove something!

The next steps are to work on your eye contact and the way that you intone your sentences.

This can be a bit much to think about when you’re struggling with what you actually want to say. Which is why it’s best to start with the other stuff first.

But take it one stage at a time and you can gradually build a confident manner that will start to perpetuate itself by making you feel strong on the inside. For a full guide to the remaining tweaks, you can make to get that feeling, run through this new infographic from Poundplace.


Build your confidence back up, and success will surely follow.

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Build your confidence back up, and success will surely follow. Here's an infographic on how to look and sound more confident: #confidence #selfesteem