“The way you overcome shyness is to become so wrapped in something you forget to be afraid”
Claudia Lady Bird Johnson.
Do you feel shy when you’re surrounded by people you don’t know well? You perhaps don’t want to be like this.
Defeating shyness is not that difficult, if you know what exactly you need to do and you commit your soul.
You can be your real self instead of being somebody you aren’t. Here’s how:
Why you feel shy
Shyness comes from the sense of being a failure.
There may be a number of reasons behind your shyness, but we’re not here to discuss them. Sure, knowing the cause may be helpful for you, but it can trap you further within your shyness. Knowing the cause can also strengthen your habit of hesitation which your shyness is based on.
Instead, you should attack coyness as this is the only way to overcome it. Be proactive.
The paradox of being shy
Shyness is not success – it’s failure. It might sound harsh and blunt, but this is hardcore truth.
For example, consider the classic question that often teachers ask, ‘Can anybody tell the right answer?”
By not raising the hand, you’re actually failing to show your worth, your understanding and you’re likely to appear like someone who’s simply getting by.
Now turn this instance around your professional field and you can surely understand how your shyness can drag you behind to prove your merit and do your job. And in this respect, tact is probably the most essential and effective skill to learn and the sooner you can do this, the better off you’ll be.
This is not the single example, there are billions of examples like this and all of them will prove time and again that shyness can make the world just to pass you by. So start stepping forward to conquer your shyness, right now.
Be happy with yourself
Each moment of your life has developed today’s YOU.
Before you initiate your effort to defeat your shyness, ask yourself if you’re happy with who you are. And if you aren’t, then you should stop focusing on overcoming shyness as because it would further worsen the conflict within yourself.
Better you realize that you can’t change your past so you should accept yourself for whatever you’re today.
And the time when you can gladly say, “I love myself in spite of some undesirable aspects” and you can be genuinely ready to reach your goals and can overcome your coyness.
Break out of your shy spell
There are a number of ways to break out of your shy spell, but they all take commitment. If you can’t commit yourself to a point of sheer obsession, you should stop reading this post now.
But if you choose to commit yourself, here are a few ways to help you move forward.
- Don’t show your weakness.
You don’t need to tell everybody about your shyness. The close ones are already aware of it while others might not even notice. Shyness is not always something visible as you think.
- Let it go light.
Avoid labeling yourself as shy. Rather present yourself as a unique individual, not an unusual trait.
- Change regular tone.
If you blush while you feel uncomfortable, never equate it with coyness.
- Start small talk.
If you don’t feel like talking to people you don’t know very well longer, start with little talk. You may try telling light jokes or small stories at every opportunity.
- Recognize your potency.
Make a list of you positive aspects; you can engage your friend or family to help you. Now read it loudly whenever you feel insecure. It will remind you of how much you have to offer.
- Speak as an authority.
Prove your worth so others forget to notice your unappreciating aspects. Speak as an authority on subjects that interest you.
- Avoid teases and bullies.
There are always some people who like to be sarcastic if it makes for a good tag line while there are people who don’t know what’s appropriate. You’ll also find people who literally don’t care about others’ feeling and can hurt anybody. Keep safe and healthy distance from such people.
- Stare down.
When you’re scared of something, just face it head on. If you’re startled, simply stare it down and lean into it.
Shyness is just of state of mind. Suffering from it must not and can’t keep you from the success you seek or you deserve. Try these simple tricks and make them amazingly work for you. It’s never too late to break out of your shy spell.
About The Author
This is a guest post by Aaron Sears from Stack of Hacks, a passionate, veteran blogger.