I believe life lessons are everywhere. And as long as we’re trying new things, learning skills, experimenting and keeping our eyes open for the wisdom in each activity (and even mistake), we can get better at most aspects of life.
Dating apps are no exception. And when it comes to that, Tinder is the game changer in the way most people meet in the 21st century, and how relationships can start.
You don’t need to be out there meeting people, being in awkward situations and wondering what to say. It’s all in your hands. Anyone looking for something is using the same app as you already, so there you go. You just need to pick what looks good and feels right, start a chat and see where it goes.
And just like I believe that anyone can start their own business, live life on their own terms and find true happiness in their work and daily life, so do I think that finding your soul mate on a dating app like Tinder is absolutely possible.
I personally know people who’ve done it. I’ve had the chance to meet some great people as a result, and I hear about Tinder success stories all the time too.
So it works.
Now I wanna talk more about the actual life lessons Tinder can teach us, mostly about relationships and communication.
Hope this inspires you to give it a try if you haven’t already, and if you’re looking for someone to date. If not, it might still save you some trouble in your relationships, help you deal with social anxiety, or just remind you of some truths about life and love.
So, here’s what Tinder can teach us:
1. Using Tinder doesn’t make you desperate.
There are more than 9 million daily users and more than half a million people actually paying for it.
None of that is desperate. It just means people are looking for something they haven’t found in their life yet, and are using an app to connect with others with the same interests and aspirations.
And there are all types of people. If you’re thinking it’s for the lonely ones, those who aren’t social and have no friends, or those just looking for one night stands, you’re wrong.
You can meet smart, beautiful and successful people there. Plus, being there also means being open-minded and available.
That’s one of the many great opportunities of the digital era we live in, and we should all be grateful
2. You can make friends there too.
If you’re being friendly, swiping right to like people who really look like a good fit for you, and truly enjoy the chat, why not keep in touch without expecting anything else?
Friendships with the opposite sex can be formed at any age, it’s just that we’re too prejudiced against it.
Let go of that old mentality and embrace the world of dating apps.
3. It’s actually a relationship hack.
I’m all about life hacks. Be it to get up early, get things done quickly, work smarter rather than harder, do business better, optimize your health, etc.
So why not hack relationships and make them work too?
Tinder makes it much easier. You’ll like only the people with similar interest, the first few sentences can say a lot about a person, and it takes less than a few hours to decide whether or not you want to meet that person.
All that saves you all the time, energy, drama and rejection that people usually experience when dating.
4. You become better at this over time.
The more people you chat with, the better you get at this.
It means that after a month of using Tinder, you’ll be a better conversationalist, more confident, will know how to start a chat and what questions to ask, it will take you much less time to know if someone’s being real and if you want to keep things going, etc.
Social skills are important. And every time you text someone or answer, you’re overcoming social anxiety. Yes, real life might feel different, but that’s still preparation for it.
5. Don’t expect anything.
Want to actually have fun and make the most of Tinder or any other dating app you’re using? Well, leave your expectations behind the moment you log in.
I’m against expectations in life in general, as they lead to creating an illusion in your mind of how things are supposed to turn out and being disappointed as a result.
But when you let go of that, you can truly take action, do your best, think clearly, be excited and positive about it, and make the most of it regardless of what happens in the end.
Let that be your approach to online dating too, and you’ll find it satisfactory and fun.
6. Use Tinder to get valuable feedback.
One of the most important steps to validating a business idea before you start working on it, is to do some research and get feedback from people, see what they like and don’t like about it, and decide on ways to make it better.
Then, even when the product is built, you should keep getting feedback and make improvements.
But that’s a great strategy for other things too, even relationships and communication. Use Tinder as a marketing tool.
For a start, begin different types of conversations with people and see which one you feel most comfortable with, what topics you enjoy the most, what most men/women don’t really want to hear online, and how to go about meeting them and taking things to the next level.
Now, there’s something even more crucial than that, which is one of the powerful life lessons Tinder teaches us. Each so-called ‘failure’ is where the real feedback can be found.
And although there’s no real failing because not connecting with someone on a deeper level just means you two weren’t the right fit for each other, every time you reject someone or get rejected, or when things just don’t seem to be clicking, you should ask yourself (or the other person) why that’s happening.
If you take a closer look at the conversations that didn’t go well, and if you ask some Tinder users you were chatting with for some time about it, you might realize that you’re talking a lot about yourself and forget to show genuine interest in the other person’s life. Or maybe you invite them on a date way too soon and it scares them.
Is it that your pictures are too provoking? Or maybe you struggle with answering personal questions?
Whatever the issue is, be sure that it will be a problem in real life when communicating with new people and even when you’re in a relationship.
So use that powerful feedback to define this, and start working on it right away.
7. Being yourself is the best recipe for success.
If you ever pretend to be someone else, exaggerate things about your life, never mention your weaknesses, and just never let yourself be who you really are, things just won’t go anywhere with another person on Tinder.
Whoever it is you’re chatting with, he or she deserves to know the real you from day 1.
Even if you manage to present yourself in a much better way, you’ll eventually need to meet in person and you can’t fake it forever.
In fact, you’ll lowering your self-esteem even more this way by not accepting who you are and not embracing your uniqueness.
So, let Tinder be your teacher on how important authenticity is. Be real. It’s good enough. After all, you want to meet someone who’ll like you for who you are and who won’t be trying to change you.
Plus, it’s so much easier to just go with the flow and say what’s on your mind, instead of trying to appeal to the other person.
So these are the life lessons Tinder shares on relationships, communication and life in general.
What about you? Are you a Tinder used and what do you think you can optimize about the way you’re using the app?