The 7 Life Lessons Tinder Teaches Us About Relationships and Communication 90

The 7 Life Lessons Tinder Teaches Us About Relationships and Communication - letsreachsuccess.com

I believe life lessons are everywhere. And as long as we’re trying new things, learning skills, experimenting and keeping our eyes open for the wisdom in each activity (and even mistake), we can get better at most aspects of life.

Dating apps are no exception. And when it comes to that, Tinder is the game changer in the way most people meet these days, and how relationships can start.

You don’t need to be out there meeting people, being in awkward situations and wondering what to say. It’s all in your hands. Anyone looking for something is using the same app as you already, so there you go. You just need to pick what looks good and feels right, start a chat and see where it goes.

And just like I believe that anyone can start their own business, live life on their own terms and find true happiness in their work and daily life, so do I think that finding your soul mate on a dating app like Tinder is absolutely possible.

I personally know people who’ve done it. I’ve had the chance to meet some great people as a result, and I hear about Tinder success stories all the time too.

So it works.

Now I wanna talk more about the actual life lessons Tinder can teach us, mostly about relationships and communication.

Hope this inspires you to give it a try if you haven’t already, and if you’re looking for someone to date. If not, it might still save you some trouble in your relationships, help you deal with social anxiety, or just remind you of some truths about life and love.

So, here’s what Tinder can teach us:

1. Using Tinder doesn’t make you desperate.

There are more than 9 million daily users and more than half a million people actually paying for it.

None of that is desperate. It just means people are looking for something they haven’t found in their life yet, and are using an app to connect with others with the same interests and aspirations.

And there are all types of people. If you’re thinking it’s for the lonely ones, those who aren’t social and have no friends, or those just looking for one night stands, you’re wrong.

You can meet smart, beautiful and successful people there. Plus, being there also means being open-minded and available.

That’s one of the many great opportunities of the digital era we live in, and we should all be grateful

2. You can make friends there too.

8 Things to Stop Doing in your Relationship - Jon Ebron

If you’re being friendly, swiping right to like people who really look like a good fit for you, and truly enjoy the chat, why not keep in touch without expecting anything else?

Friendships with the opposite sex can be formed at any age, it’s just that we’re too prejudiced against it.

Let go of that old mentality and embrace the world of dating apps.

3. It’s actually a relationship hack.

I’m all about life hacks. Be it to get up early, get things done quickly, work smarter rather than harder, do business better, optimize your health, etc.

So why not hack relationships too?

Tinder makes it much easier. You’ll like only the people with similar interest, the first few sentences can say a lot about a person, and it takes less than a few hours to decide whether or not you want to meet that person.

All that saves you all the time, energy, drama and rejection that people usually experience when dating.

4. You become better at this over time.

The more people you chat with, the better you get at this. It means that after a month of using Tinder, you’ll be a better conversationalist, more confident, will know how to start a chat and what questions to ask, it will take you much less time to know if someone’s being real and if you want to keep things going, etc.

Social skills are important. And every time you text someone or answer, you’re overcoming social anxiety. Yes, real life might feel different, but that’s still preparation for it.

5. Don’t expect anything.

Want to actually have fun and make the most of Tinder or any other dating app you’re using? Well, leave your expectations behind the moment you log in.

I’m against expectations in life in general, as they lead to creating an illusion in your mind of how things are supposed to turn out and being disappointed as a result.

But when you let go of that, you can truly take action, do your best, think clearly, be excited and positive about it, and make the most of it regardless of what happens in the end.

Let that be your approach to online dating too, and you’ll find it satisfactory and fun.

6. Use Tinder to get valuable feedback.

Dealing with Negativity from Others on Your Entrepreneurial Journey - Let's Reach Success

One of the most important steps to validating a business idea before you start working on it, is to do some research and get feedback from people, see what they like and don’t like about it, and decide on ways to make it better.

Then, even when the product is built, you should keep getting feedback and make improvements.

But that’s a great strategy for other things too, even relationships and communication. Use Tinder as a marketing tool.

For a start, begin different types of conversations with people and see which one you feel most comfortable with, what topics you enjoy the most, what most men/women don’t really want to hear online, and how to go about meeting them and taking things to the next level.

Now, there’s something even more crucial than that, which is one of the powerful life lessons Tinder teaches us. Each so-called ‘failure’ is where the real feedback can be found.

And although there’s no real failing because not connecting with someone on a deeper level just means you two weren’t the right fit for each other, every time you reject someone or get rejected, or when things just don’t seem to be clicking, you should ask yourself (or the other person) why that’s happening.

If you take a closer look at the conversations that didn’t go well, and if you ask some Tinder users you were chatting with for some time about it, you might realize that you’re talking a lot about yourself and forget to show genuine interest in the other person’s life. Or maybe you invite them on a date way too soon and it scares them.

Is it that your pictures are too provoking? Or maybe you struggle with answering personal questions?

Whatever the issue is, be sure that it will be a problem in real life when communicating with new people and even when you’re in a relationship.

So use that powerful feedback to define this, and start working on it right away.

7. Being yourself is the best recipe for success.

If you ever pretend to be someone else, exaggerate things about your life, never mention your weaknesses, and just never let yourself be who you really are, things just won’t go anywhere with another person on Tinder.

Whoever it is you’re chatting with, he or she deserves to know the real you from day 1. Even if you manage to present yourself in a much better way, you’ll eventually need to meet in person and you can’t fake it forever.

In fact, you’ll lowering your self-esteem even more this way by not accepting who you are and not embracing your uniqueness.

So, let Tinder be your teacher on how important authenticity is. Be real. It’s good enough. After all, you want to meet someone who’ll like you for who you are and who won’t be trying to change you.

Plus, it’s so much easier to just go with the flow and say what’s on your mind, instead of trying to appeal to the other person.

So these are the life lessons Tinder shares on relationships, communication and life in general.

What about you? Are you a Tinder used and what do you think you can optimize about the way you’re using the app?

Save

Get The Lifestyle Designer's Digest
Directly into your inbox every Monday.
Previous ArticleNext Article

The Five Elements of Flawless Customer Experience 11

The Five Elements of Flawless Customer Experience

Providing a flawless customer experience is the ultimate goal for any business.

There’s a lot that goes into creating a customer experience that keeps your clients coming back for more. In fact, there’s so much involved that it can almost seem overwhelming.

However, providing a flawless customer experience becomes much easier when you approach the task through these five distinct elements:

Time
Understanding
Ownership of Emotions
The Unexpected
Follow-Through

Time

When it comes to your customers’ satisfaction, time is essential. Think of how a great experience at a new restaurant quickly sours if you’re left waiting for your food to arrive. Think of how your excitement over a great department store sale turns into frustration as you stand in line for what seems like hours.

Time is your most valuable resource and it is up to you to make sure you’re using your customers’ time wisely.

This is why restaurants have comfortable waiting areas with drinks and appetizers, or why airports have lounges with restaurants, shops, and even bars.

If your customers are being forced to wait for a service, make them feel as if their time spent is not wasted. The more positive drivers you offer customers, the less likely they are to grow dissatisfied with their experience.

Think of how you can implement this in your own business. Are there places where you can help fill customers’ time? Are there places where technology can be used to cut down on the time it takes to complete a task? Remember, it’s the customers’ time that should be valued, not your own.

Understanding

How to Use Content Marketing to Boost Your Business 6 Marketing Influencers You Must Follow

You must understand what your customers want, when they want it, and how.

While this may seem daunting, getting a better understanding of your customers doesn’t take millions of dollars, complex data analytics, and a degree in psychology. Instead, all it takes is a simple look. Watch their process, engage with them, ask them questions, and listen to them.  

How are customers interacting with your product? What’s the first thing they do when they enter your store? What’s the last thing they do before they leave? How long are they spending in each department? Do you notice anything that hampers their experience?

Take a look at your competitors. How are your potential customers interacting with them? What does this business offer that you don’t or vice versa? What is your, as Harvard Business School professor Clayton M. Christensen says, “job to be done?” What are your customers hiring your product or service to accomplish? Understand why your users are turning to your products.

Ownership of Emotions

Many companies have already taken hold of their customers’ emotions, though cynically. Subliminal advertising is a key example. However, the ownership of emotions does not have to be cynical. When used correctly, it can be the “holy grail” for companies.

Owning emotions begins with the aforementioned ability to understand. When you truly understand a customer’s choices and then act to make the experience better, you’re building a relationship of trust. That trust is the foundation of emotional ownership.

One way to build this trust is to reduce the “emotional” noise that surrounds your customers. Let them know that, even on their worst day, your business or product is there for them and that it will be a constant in their lives.

Think of restaurants and the long wait times you have to endure when they’re busy. Think of how angry—or “hangry”—you feel as you stand around, waiting for your table, and listening to your stomach growl. However, think of how some restaurants are able to reduce that emotional noise by serving you finger foods and drinks as you wait.

Also, seek to understand what emotionally motivates your customers.

Why should they be motivated to visit your store or use your product? To feel confident? Free? Unique? Secure? Successful? Research shows that all human beings are motivated by one of those factors.

The Unexpected

Experiences become stronger and more memorable when they’re accompanied by an element of surprise. Surprise can be addictive, which will only keep your customers coming back for more.

Think about mailing your customers or clients small packages with gifts and swag. Everyone loves to get mail and everyone loves free stuff, especially when it’s least expected.

A surprise doesn’t have to be a huge flash mob (though it could be!). Hand out snacks at your store. Is it a cold day? Give your customers hot chocolate or warm punch. Is it a client’s birthday? Send a card! Even a small note of thanks for a customer’s business is a nice little surprise.

The most important thing to remember: simply be sincere and don’t become predictable. Chocolates on hotel pillows were once a great surprise for guests. However, now that their wow-factor has faded, hotels are continuously trying to get back to the “unexpected.”

Follow-Through

You’ve made promises and established goals. The only thing that’s left is to follow through on them. This starts with creating your mission statement, one that you, your employees, and your customers can commit to it. This will define your customer experience.

Your mission statement must promise to impact yourself/your business, the community, or the world. It may commit to impacting one, or all three. However, whatever it promises, you must follow through on. Your customers’ trust, and thus their experience, depends on it.

More about these five elements can be discovered in Unforgettable: Designing Customer Experiences that Stick, to be published in 2018.

***
Kyle H. David has made a career in technology and entrepreneurship for nearly 20 years. In 2001, he formed The Kyle David Group, now KDG. Over the past 16 years, KDG has grown at a rapid pace, attracting clients ranging from the United States Senate to major financial institutions, international nonprofits, and Division I universities.