You might be playing the blame game without even realizing. That’s when blaming others becomes a daily practice and you get used to it so much that you use it to deal with all your life’s problems.
But blaming others is a harmful behavior. It’s ruining your relationships, mental health and future.
Here’s how exactly. Hopefully, these reasons will motivate you to stop blaming and immediately notice who blames you so you can remove such people from your life.
6 Reasons Why Blaming Others is Wrong
1. It’s a defense mechanism.
If you think about it, you’ll find out that blaming never works effectively.
Maybe you point out what a person did wrong instead of focusing on the effort they put or you’re being told you could have done something better (preparing a meal, parking your car, completing a project at work). In every case, the blame game is a defense mechanism, just like denial, acting out and isolation.
These are all a way for people to avoid dealing with anxiety, to not face reality, to ignore their own flaws and insecurities, and to find comfort quickly.
2. It pushes people away.
If you keep blaming others, eventually you’ll have no one around you that truly supports you or is happy in your company.
The blame game won’t get you far. Life is about forming connections and being social as this allows you to meet amazing people, win friends and find your soulmate.
3. We don’t have the right to blame.
It’s hard for us to figure out why we really do what we do (or others, for that matter). That means we are never sure of the underlying causes, which prevents us from being objective and our arguments are rarely logical.
If you remember this any time you’re about to blame, you will stay silent and save many conflicts from escalating.
4. It’s the easy way out.
Blaming others is a way to avoid taking responsibility. It’s yet another excuse you’re making not to deal with the real cause of the problem (which most probably involves you in some way or is about your negative reaction to what someone else did).
Such a shortcut doesn’t lead to stable relationships, to learning from your mistakes, to having peace of mind, or even achieving your goals.
Stop blaming others and instead choose honest communication, letting go of the past, being present, and showing empathy.
5. Everyone playing the blame game loses.
If you notice the signs of blaming and find out why you reacted like that, you have a chance to grow from your experience. This, in turn, can help you have meaningful relationships with others.
Many people stop playing the blame game because it’s exhausting. They also notice that they never gain anything out of it so a different approach might be a more effective way to deal with things.
6. You can blame anything, from society and life to therapy and education.
Another reason why blaming others is an awful habit is that it’s controlling you. You start blaming more and more as it’s the only thing you know. Soon, anything can be the reason why you’re refusing to accept and take responsibility.
That might be your parents and how they treated you in your childhood, your teachers at school, society, your partner, the country you live in, the therapist you’re seeing, your children, your boss and colleagues, etc.
Once you fall into the trap, there will be more and more things around you to blame and you’ll never face reality.
Let go of the need to blame, Don’t let the problem blind you and choose empathy instead of judgment.
If you ever catch yourself blaming others again, keep in mind the reasons above to avoid taking things to the next level.