Social Media is Draining Me. Here’s What I’m Focusing on Instead

Are you feeling drained by social media? Do you feel like you’re posting because you have to? Do you avoid opening the app and then feel guilty knowing you need consistency to build your audience and engage with people? Does it bother you how much others are posting, how they always seem to have so much to say and everyone loves their content?

Well, you’re not alone. In today’s episode, I share what I’m doing about it so I don’t rely on algorithms, short-form video and lack of authenticity. Tune in below:

Show Notes:

  • What’s changed about Instagram
  • A type of business owners that scale thanks to IG
  • What I’m doing instead
  • How I’m making my business more interactive without socials
  • Where to promote your stuff, if not on socials
  • The price we pay for endless scrolling
  • My take on cold DMs
  • A quick way to see if IG is working for you or not


I’m in this period again, mostly with Instagram which became my main social channel for business in the last 2 years. But I’m exhausted, I’d rather delete the app and never open it again than continue showing up when I don’t want to.

I know so many business owners who are experiencing the same. And hey, we are supposed to be the people who know how this works, have tried all platforms and chosen the best one for them, know how to deal with imposter syndrome, and who keep engaging their people on their main channels. But Instagram changed, I think you’d agree.

The algorithm changed in a way I don’t like too. Each app has the goal of keeping you there for as long as possible. And yet I’m an advocate of living your life away from your phone, of only consciously opening Instagram and any other social when you have something to say, want to connect with someone or just wanna quickly see what your favorite people are up to. Why would you stay there any longer when there’s so much else you could be doing with your time?

Sadly, I’ve also noticed how more and more people who scale quickly on Instagram aren’t actually giving good advice, stay on the surface with their content, repeat what everyone else is saying, and simply do what gets clicks.

I don’t get the Reel trend either but it’s what Instagram wants us to do, and it wants us to create a lot of it.

I’m not into following trends just to chase followers. These short videos don’t provide much value, and yet they are perfect for the short attention span of users.

I’m still a lover of taking courses, doing mindset work, writing and reading blog posts, recording podcast episodes and emailing my list. So this is where you can find me.

There I go deep, I cover whole topics, I teach step-by-step processes. The content is evergreen, people can access it any time. It’s not a 60-second video and it doesn’t disappear in 24 hours. It doesn’t just share one quick tip without telling you how to apply it to your life and without sharing actual examples of how I’m embodying what I teach.

On Instagram, people want immediate access to the answer of 1 question they have, yet most don’t take action on it. They want quick tips and shortcuts and to earn big money. 

The type of business owners that scaled thanks to IG

As a result, many coaches and other entrepreneurs built their brands there solely around that – teaching people how to make 5 and 6 and 7 figures. 

Some don’t make it themselves. Others haven’t been in business long enough to know what actually goes into it and how to handle people’s struggles. 

Some of these people might be earning that much but when you remove taxes and expenses and everything else, they aren’t left with much. Some can even be in debt, don’t love their life, don’t have the freedom they claim to have. 

They tell you they teach secret processes, an easy framework, proven strategies for quick scaling. But is that what we really want?

How can you sustain that business even if you build it quickly? What will you do after you have your first 5-figure month? How will you deal with the responsibility that comes with all this, with providing the value that’s worth this and more, with turning this into recurring revenue, with navigating through changes in the economy?

What I’ll do instead

Social media is what we are told we should be doing to do well in business. But it’s not making me feel alive anymore.

It’s a competition, it’s comparison, it’s perfectionism, it’s unrealistic numbers and lifestyle standards. This isn’t the energy I want to be in.

I prefer what’s happening behind the scenes and how there’s still connection involved, even if it’s not in real time. 

That’s my email list and the newsletters I send people weekly, the new piece I share on the podcast and blog every week. Serving my students inside courses.

I’m stepping away from Instagram as it costs me so much energy and yet doesn’t give me anything. Instead, I want to recreate that social effect it was giving me inside my community. I’ll do that by engaging with my email subscribers more. Growing blog traffic again so new people can find me, join my list and be part of my audience.

How I’m making my business more interactive without socials

I also have an idea that I can’t wait to bring to life. It’s about a community for bloggers, a membership where they can feel seen, make friends, share wins, ask questions, be in my energy, stay accountable and – of course – learn how to grow their blogging business and build the skills necessary to make it in that industry. 

I’m really excited for it, it’s like nothing I’ve ever created before and it’s as much for me as  it is for the blogger who is tired of feeling isolated in business and wants to get access to traffic and monetization strategies while being around like-minded bloggers with the same goals.

I’m also making my courses more interactive and getting closer to the students inside them. Encouraging them to give me feedback, leave comments and much more. There are different ways you too can add interactive elements like that to your business.

This approach is more introvert-friendly as there aren’t updates in real time, there doesn’t need to be any video involved. But guess what? Most bloggers are introverts and that doesn’t go well on Instagram.

If I wanted to keep up with others, I’d be sharing pictures of my lifestyle all day, how much freedom I have, where I live, where I travel, and use this as my selling point. 

But it won’t feel authentic, it’s not me, I’m not big on pictures even when I travel. And I prefer to live in the moment, then later internalize it, and share the lessons with you in a newsletter or a podcast episode. But actually living it is for myself.

Where to promote your stuff, if not on socials?

If all this sounds appealing to you and you too have felt the same for some time and wanna get away from social media and just do more of what you love online and on the platforms that make you feel good, you might be asking: but where will you find clients if not on Instagram, where will you promote your product launches, where will you share your new blog post?

And I can tell you where. There are other places. I’m sharing my content on Pinterest, for example. That’s perfect for articles.

Most of the action during my launches happens inside my email list. That’s why the rest of the time I provide value for free and grow my audience and invite those new people to join my list. This is where later they will hear about my offer.

There are multiple points of access, I’m on many platforms and I can get found at any moment. Almost no one finds me from Instagram now.

And if they do, they stay there. They don’t really wanna invest the time to listen to a whole podcast episode. They don’t read the whole sales page and so don’t know what my courses can do for them. They don’t get on my email list and follow my weekly updates. Some do, of course, but it’s not the majority.

Also read: How I Promote a New Offer Without Social Media

The price we pay for endless scrolling

And I believe that if you don’t feel good on a specific social media platform, you can try to change something, switch your mindset, give it another go, post different content and just have fun. But often, it’s just not where you’re meant to be spending your time. 

Because another disadvantage is how much time we waste scrolling on Instagram. Almost everyone is guilty of that. 

Scrolling leads to seeing things we weren’t looking for and checking out new people and learning about their business and comparing ourselves to them. Just by seeing their big numbers and shiny lifestyle. There’s more behind the scenes.

Not many are authentic in the business industry, they share the highs, not the lows. So don’t make their journey or what’s on the surface mean anything about you and your business.

The cold DMs

Another reason why I wanna step away from Instagram is because of the strangers that approach me with cold DMs, who seemingly didn’t even spend 10 seconds to look around my profile and instead ask me something pretty basic and obvious which is already mentioned there. 

I don’t reply, and IG probably sees I’m not active in the DMs because of that. Many of these people persist, they message me multiple times. It can be as ridiculous as someone wanting to grow my Instagram and presenting themselves as a professional in the industry, and yet their IG looks new and bad.

Or others who want to help me with whatever it is they are teaching, but from the way they approach me I can see they don’t even know their stuff well. They probably just started, someone told them they will get clients the more cold DMs they send, so they went for it.

This is not the community I wanna be part of.

I’m sure you might be having meaningful conversations with some people on IG, but is it the majority of it? Is it worth staying just for a few small benefits?

Final words

Look at how much time in total you spend on IG weekly, how much effort it costs you to figure out what to post, engage with others, or even worry that your numbers aren’t growing. Then calculate how many new clients you got or sales you made solely thanks to IG in the last months.  

Let the numbers help you decide what move to make next.

Same goes for Facebook. I was never a fan of it, and I know many people who simply do it because they should. Facebook groups are still the most popular way to build a community around your course or coaching program, sure. But you’re playing by Facebook’s rules, let’s not forget that.

The community I’ll be starting won’t be hosted there. It will be something else, something the members and I will have a say in, not the algorithm.

So I’ll leave you with that. I’m curious what you think. If you feel the same way, reach out and let’s talk about it.